December 1.2008

Why did I pick this picture from last year? Because it's so clean and peaceful'. I am not fitting in my own skin today. Right now I'm trying to find something worthwhile to complain.
It's hard, not in my nature to complain.
But already last night my TV satellite did not respond. I could not watch the news. Hoping that this morning it will be better - no such luck. Aggravating. Phoned Bell Express. Took an hour and half to follow what a girl told me to do. I suppose she got tired explaining and said it's fine now, leave for two ours on and it will turn to normal, then turn what channel you like. I had got stuck on the weather channel last night.
So after all the trembling while following the girls directions my blood pressure went up and I was not sure I should not go to emergency before I get a stroke. Anyway, two hours later the picture came on to the weather channel. I switched to CTV and all I got was scattering colours and partial syllables of the report. I did feel sick. Switched the TV off and debated weather I should call Dirk tonight. But that just got my blood pressure higher - I don't like to be constantly bothering him. Finished an other afghan , took a tranquilizer, laid down long enough to read a short story and then decided to call Bell back again. The tranquilizer must have stopped my inside trembling. I did get a man directing what to do this time. Did not take long - he said they have had so many complaints because most TVs have not been updated and the recent snow storms have affected Ontario's receptions. So he ordered a service man for Dec. 4th to come and adjust it. After me telling about the number of services I've had this year, he said that I've been such a long time customer, they will serve and update, but it cost $75.00. I laughed and sad that sure makes expensive news time for me, then that is all I watch. So he said after a bit of checking, that for a good customer they will not charge the service, just my monthly pay will be up extra $4.20. Well, I just said thank you and he assured that the man will be here at noon Thursday. I do feel more calm now, the pill must have made more actions inside me.
Somehow I could not get to any distant work, just now though, the bread machine beeped, I will have a fresh bread for change.
I really feel like to complain or scream about all these complicated deeds. I understand better, but it is hard to keep myself in calm control.
So I was looking for a photo that would picture my angry mind, but instead I found this last years snow day in middle of November and it looked so clean and peaceful, I just sat down, watched it a while and then thought to put it on the blog. We have had days with not exactly pleasant weather. So look at that one and see: complain or anger - the Lord covers it clean and white...